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About

Jennifer Simmons Pineapples and Palm Trees boutique, Lincoln, California

Jennifer Simmons

Hello!  I'm Jennifer Simmons, but since we're hanging out, please call me Jenn.  So what can be said about me that is truly useful here? I'm a little warped and can find humor in pretty much anything, especially at the most inappropriate time and place. I like to think I'm funny, my family will tell you emphatically that I am not... but perhaps a bit more sarcastic.  Not in a mean way, just kind of... salty. And dark. Not sure if these truly correlate, but I'm over 50 and I am NOT politically correct; consider yourself warned! I do speak from my heart, but know that I never mean to offend or hurt others feelings, but sometimes I do come off like an ass-hat as my son will gladly tell you. If you offend easily, proceed with caution!

I come from a small family, and most of my adult life I worked as a civilian in county and city law enforcement (911/HR/Crime Analyst).  My dad, brother, step-dad and husband all worked as peace officers, and my mom retired as a nurse, so it’s kind of what I am most familiar with.

My hubby is a little older than me....ok, a lot older! so when he retired as Police Chief, I got to go, too! YAY!!!!  But let me tell you, I can say that now; back then...not so much. I’ve always worked. Not working sounded super scary, as my parents raised me to always take care of myself.

Enter direct sales.

After graduating from high school, I actually dabbled in direct sales, mainly to get my favorite makeup at cost, but never thought of it as a 'real' business.  After about a year and a half, I quit. Fast forward several years, I married, had a son, divorced and remarried.  All this time, I still used my favorite direct selling makeup products.  Shortly after we retired, at an outing for lunch, my normally rather subdued hubby commented on our waitress.  She was clearly a beautiful woman, but he remarked she needs Mary Kay!  I cracked up because, yes…yes indeed, she did!  And Code 3 at that!  Emerald green eyeshadow, orange blush and pink lipstick all on the wrong color of foundation for her skin color. Lord love a duck ...and bless her heart!

I texted my dealer and asked if she was available, so I could sign up again. If you are thinking of going into direct sales, just know that rarely, if ever, happens. That was over 10 year ago. Since then, I have also joined and left a variety of Direct Selling companies.  Not because I'm flakey, but because I'd rather join a company for a short period of time, to get the best price, for the products I love. I have even been a kit-knapper - one who buys the starter kit with no intention of actually running a business.

Let's be honest, Direct Sales can be difficult and is not as easy as everyone thinks. Direct Sales companies typically offer part-time work for full-time pay, be your boss and set your own hours, and the biggie, earn unlimited income.  While those things are factual, they are not likely.

Don't get me wrong, I am a firm believer in direct sales and all the benefits and joy it can bring you. Unfortunately, direct sales, MLM, and the like are dirty words and often make people cringe. And for good reason!  Some companies lack proper training for their consultants, some individuals simply have poor ethics, while others have no good sense. For those in direct sales, or are maybe considering it, I hope to support and cheer for you along the way by sharing my knowledge and experiences - the good, the bad and the ugly. Of course I wouldn't be here without my crazy family shrubbery…as I like to call it, because trust me, it's surely not a tree.

I am adopted, have been married/divorced/remarried, have a kid, bonus-kids some of whom are older than me, grandkids and great-grandkids. I have roughly 3+ sets of parents, and at some point have had at least that many grandparents, bonus-grandparents, and in-laws. Why not throw in a little LGBTQ, right? My Sonshine is the light of my life and our comedy relief. Oh, and I love cats - I'll be the old crazy cat lady someday. Also, I clearly love pineapples, the international sign of welcome, by the way, and palm trees - pretty much anything tropical. Which is slightly amusing since I'm the color of vampires and allergic to the sun. Ahhh the irony...

So, all in all, I feel pretty well rounded. I hope thru my blog posts you will find support, a little humor and know that you are not alone in your journey.

If blog stuff is not your cup of tea and your just here to shop, awesome! My goal is to help make you feel pretty and confident. Why is that so important to me?  Because I hate shopping. Like really hate shopping. Nothing ever fits right and I aways leave the stores seriously bummed. So, if I can help you feel pretty and confident with clothing, jewelry, skin care or accessories, or even my rare blog posts, then my business will be a success!

Click here to follow me and learn more about my family shrubbery and direct sales adventures, tips and information!

Signature Jenn